First of let me start off with cute pics of my grandson, yes I’m going to be that Gigi😂I had the pleasure of having him and my sons girlfriend spend the week with me. So if you notice I was missing this sweet lil guy is why! My son, girlfriend, and her mom was here and we had blast. All night partying, talking, laughing, and drinking 🙃I was in granny heaven with all the love surrounding me. Just think a couple of months ago I checked myself into the hospital because I wanted to end it all. Glad I came to my senses when I did and sought out help. My son seems really happy, the baby is absolutely beautiful, and their family has accepted all of us. So a whole week of love from both sides of Kayden’s family. This was the happiest I’ve been in a long time. Well then I got the bad news that my son would be moving back to Texas.😞 Yes, I’m so heartbroken because I kind of got use to him being around again. I enjoyed cooking for him and the talks we have. I know he isn’t my little boy anymore, and he showed me just how much of a man he was. He was up when baby got up, changed diapers,(even the poopy ones), fed him, and just really helped out a lot. I offered my time, but he was having none of that. Now this isn’t how I expected his life to turn out, but it did! I know he has taken the things I’ve taught him and applied them to his life. I’m very proud of him, and wish the best for his whole new little family.
So then today happens, well kind of all week, but I was distracted with all the company. The bad, negative thoughts in my head. No, not the suicidal ones, just the self-doubt, guilt, and worthless ones. I know I missed a couple of days on my meds, because didn’t I want to mix with drinks. These thoughts just been pushing to get inside my head all week, and this morning they did. I woke up with no motivation, and self-doubt. Still trying to wrap my head around this damn disease. How long will I continue to feel this way? Does it get better? I mean it’s a damn pain in the ass to feel this way. After all that excitement, I found myself going to bed at 5pm on a Friday night. Only to sleep half the day today! I have missed two therapy appointments and she has been calling like crazy. She probably thinks I’ve given up on therapy. I’ll call and explain my busy schedule. Anywho, just wanted to share with you all. Everything has been perfect this week and I can’t wait to see my little man again.😍Hoping you all were surviving without my posts, lol! Well it’s time to get back to normal, whatever the hell that is??? Chat soon….