Good morning all, it’s been a couple of days since I posted. Last week started off super, than by Wednesday I was in complete meltdown. (also was out of meds) Things were being thrown at me from left to right, and I just didn’t have the strength to fight back. I was weak and I let life totally get the best of me last week, I’m still in place in my life that makes me sick. I cried, laid in the bed, didn’t fix my hair, and of course I avoided everyone. I even called my therapist and informed her that I was no longer going to be seeing her. Yes, it got that damn bad! I was sick to my stomach, and didn’t eat anything at all. Little did I know two days without my meds was not a good thing. No one informed me of the side effects that came along with not taking them. So the last part of the week was complete HOT MESS! I didn’t get anything done as usual, all I did was keep asking God to take this illness away from me. I forgot every coping skill I learned in therapy, I was just a damn mess. Then it hit me on Saturday, that I needed to ‘man up’, I needed to get out of bed and stop letting depression win all the time. Every time things don’t go the way I have plan, I crawl back into my shell and stay stuck there. I looked around my office and saw all the progress I have made, and decided that I have to fucking do better. I mean I have my second e-book sitting here ready for publish and I haven’t even released it yet. I have a new life certificate that I earned last week, new items in my store and my grand baby is turning three months old tomorrow. See, there are so many good things I have going on. I just can’t for the life me get my shit together! Oh well I wasted a whole 4 days being depressed, and withdrawn, accomplishing not one damn thing. I’m so mad I could scream. I feel like the world isn’t going to be waiting much longer for me to come around. Lately I’ve been so afraid to step out of my shell, I mean my anxiety is at an all time high right now. I that someone out there can relate to what I’m going through, but please don’t get stuck. Being stuck isn’t fun and it is crippling me. I just feel so helpless sometimes, and very embarrassed by this. Here I am a 40-year-old granny, who can’t get her shit together. This also bothers me, than back in my shell I go. LIfe shouldn’t be this hard, hell it probably isn’t, I just over think the whole damn thing. Well you live and learn, so I better get my ass up and get to adulting. Have a great week, and don’t get stuck. Chat soon…..