Hey there, hope all of you are well tonight. Needed to get something off my chest….have you ever hated someone so bad it hurts????? I mean I have disliked this person for several years and literally I have prayed about it. This person is a thorn in my side and no one really knows this, I don’t know if it’s small of me to keep hating this person. I’m fine as long as I don’t see them, but then others come around and mention their name and what they do. I just want to scream……I don’t know if I should share in writing what I wish I could do to them, lol don’t want to leave a trail. I need advice bad, because tonight I just had a panic attack thinking about this person. I know I should forgive and I have, it’s just my crazy brain won’t let up.
“We punish other people for the same mistake a thousands times. Every time it comes in your memory, you judge them again and punish them again.” -Miguel Angel Ruiz
This quote is exactly how my brain feels, I keep reliving all the shit I went through with this person, it’s like being tortured all over again even though the torturer is gone bye-bye. I know this is time-consuming, but just for a little minute I get so damn angry. I guess I’m pissed off because this person seriously doesn’t think they did anything wrong. That shit eats my spirit up inside, how can they be so incredibly cocky about what went down. I just want to banish them from my kingdom, never to be seen again. LOL ok yall know I had to make myself laugh to keep from killing somebody. I really want to move passed this, but I can’t. Forgiveness seems so impossible and shit I’m tired of people beating up on me because I’m FABULOUS. Shit this goes out to my family and my supposed to be friends, no longer will I let people into my life to tear down my soul. I have to finally start taking care of me, and if that means leaving people behind shit BYE FELICIA….
Whoo, that felt good….if I had a cocktail that would have hit the spot, lol!!! Oh well off to bed I go and yes I will continue to pray about this person and the situation. Chat soon…..
Depressive Diva (Ms. Fran)