10 Quick Steps To Achieve Success Before 2020…

If you're anything like me, you don't need a New Year 🎊to be great...all you need is today!
Here are 10 quick steps to become the best version of yourself before 2020👇🏾 

1️⃣. Take passionate action towards living your life by design. Talk is cheap. Action = deposits in the bank of a passionately authentic future. Without it, passion is void.

2️⃣. Commit to yourself as well as those you love to create powerfully a life you can love. Instead of reacting, commit to creating from your heart and soul, out of love rather than fear. Be amazed as the transformation begins.

3️⃣. Recognize and embrace the thought that each moment is perfect regardless of its outcome. If you are not pleased with the outcome, decide to use that moment to learn from and make the appropriate shift.

4️⃣. Dwell completely in a place of gratitude. Slipping into neediness will become less of a habit when you repeatedly shift towards gratitude, away from poverty consciousness.

5️⃣. Use a Passion Formula of Recognize/Reevaluate/Restore in place of the Shoulda/Woulda/Coulda whirlwind. The former on based in increased knowledge and abundance while the latter focuses on scarcity and lack. You would rather be richly passionate!

6️⃣. Keep humor at the forefront of thought, laughing at and with yourself when possible. You may find yourself quite entertaining when you loosen up! Humor is very attractive, very passionate: life-giving.

7️⃣. Trust that you are in the right place at the right time to learn whatever lessons you are meant to be learning. Become a part of a community of people where you can express from the heart and embrace each other’s dreams and life philosophy. Know that you will be honored as you honor one another.

8️⃣. When emotions arise, flow with them. Take time out to be fully in the moment. This will model for children and your colleagues what it means to be authentically engaged in life, no matter what is dished out. The freedom for you AND those whose lives you touch will amaze you.

9️⃣. Be strongly vulnerable in connecting with people core to core instead of superficially. Replace backing any behavior with drawing close behavior. Practice interdependency for the strength of synergy rather than the weakness of self-indulgence.

🔟. Believe that you are the architect of your destiny. No one can take your passionate future from you except for you! Create your life authentically. Watch everything flow into place with perfect, passionate precision.

Go out and be great my dear…you can be your best self now, no need to wait!💪🏾💋

𝓞𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓪 𝓑. 𝓢𝓱𝓮𝓹𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓭

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Are You Spending The Holidays 🎄With Your Inlaws?🤷🏾‍♀️ Here are a few tips to surviving it:

Where are you spending the holidays?

Do you like the people you will be spending it with🤦🏾‍♀️

If you’re married like me, then you have to worry about you know…the in-laws…😳

Now, lucky for me both sets of my in-laws live in Texas and my husband’s real mother hates me 🤪🤷🏾‍♀️, but my step-mother-in-law loves me to pieces…

Either way, guess what I don’t have to spend any time with them this year…whewwww! The pressure is off, but since you have to here are a few tips on surviving this holiday season without causing any damage to your relationships…😁👇🏾

Many families of all ages feel intense stress as they approach the holiday season. They know someone’s feelings will inevitably be hurt. They are stretched to spend time with both sides of their family or end up feeling guilty they can’t be everywhere. Then there’s the stress of spending time with someone you don’t necessarily get along with.

Some families use every combination possible to make their extended family happy. Christmas morning at home, Lunch at noon at her mom’s house, late evening at his dad’s house. Then throw in divorced and blended family dynamics and the day became even fuller. It can often mean spending only a few minutes at any one place.

The holiday season is the perfect time to reconsider how you want to be with extended family, particularly your in-laws. The holiday season is a time for creating your own traditions while setting boundaries with your in-laws. It’s time to determine what you want and how you want to spend your holiday.

Give these 7 tips a try and see how your family gathering becomes memorable instead of wretched:

Communicate

It’s important to communicate your wishes in a way that doesn’t make them feel like you don’t care. Communicate in advance what you want. Ask them what their preferences are as well. Then work on creating a plan that works for all of you.

Find neutral ground

If the stress comes from going to one family’s house instead of the other’s home, invite everyone to a beach house, rented cabin or someplace you can all enjoy that no one owns the space.

Get them involved

Invite them to join in what’s happening throughout the day. Include your mother-in-law in the meal prep or your daughter-in-law in the gift wrapping. Have your father-in-law read the Christmas story or another family favorite story. Try to make them feel comfortable and welcome. If you’re going to their house, ask if you can help them in some way. Give your mother-in-law compliments, talk to your father-in-law about topics that mean something to him.

It’s not personal

Often the tension we feel from out in-laws at this time of year comes from their being stressed as well. This type of stress can make that seemingly harmless bad behavior to become even more exaggerated. It’s more about their insecurities than it is about you, so try to leave the defensive mode at home.

Look on the humorous side

It’s much easier to laugh at what your in-law says or does than to spend the holidays tense and on edge. Search hard to find the humor in situations that might otherwise make you feel criticized or left out. Humor helps you stay calm at the time and keeps some of the tension from exploding into a full-blown breakdown.

Plan an exit strategy

When you visit your in-law’s house, have an agreed amount of time you will stay. If it’s a matter of one of you want to stay longer, you may have to arrive in two cars. Let the family know one of you need to leave at a certain time for whatever reason.

Have some downtime

Find a quiet time for yourself during the hectic holiday season. You need to re-energize. Or if you are staying at your in-laws, you may need to find a little quiet time to catch your breath or get away from them. 🙌🏾

End Goals On Relieving Holiday Stress

The goal is to make progress on having a less stressed holiday with your in-laws. There won’t be perfection. It’s a matter of building a relationship with the family that will grow with time. With a little effort on your part, and hopefully, theirs too, you could end up having one of the calmest holidays you’ve ever had.

Best Wishes Friends….🎄

𝓞𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓪 𝓑. 𝓢𝓱𝓮𝓹𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓭

Life Empowerment Mentor/ Transformation Coach

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Happy December…Are You Ready To Create The Day You Want???

Happy Monday Friends...

Do you tend to let your outer circumstances set the tone for each day?  Do you allow other people and events to trigger feelings of anger, frustration, impatience and more?  

When you do this, you are not using the power you have available to you!  By using the Law of Attraction, you can turn every day into a great day.  One way to do that is by using intentions and visualization to create your day.

When you first wake up in the morning, spend 10 minutes or so thinking about the types of things you’d like to experience that day.  How would you like your workday to go?  What kind of people would you like to meet?  Would you like to receive some great opportunities to advance your career or financial situation?  How would you like to feel for the majority of your day?

Grab a blank journal or notebook and jot these details down!  Once you’ve got all the details written down, spend a few minutes vividly imagining each scenario in your mind, exactly as you would like it to happen.  Pretend you’re watching a movie in your mind, seeing it all play out exactly as you’d like it to.

Most importantly, allow yourself to feel as if they were actually happening now.  Immerse yourself in feelings of excitement, joy, happiness, and gratitude as you enjoy one great experience after another.  Use this same process for every experience you’d like to have that day.

By the time you’re finished you should be feeling fantastic; buzzing with good spirits and high expectations!

Then continue with your normal routine, taking special care not to be “attached” to any specific events or experiences, just simply staying open to whatever comes.  Keep affirming that great things are going to happen to you that day, and you feel great about all of the blessings and abundance in your life.

At the same time, avoid getting entangled in feelings of worry, anxiety, frustration, and anger as much as possible throughout the day because those feelings will interfere with the positive energy you’ve already put out.
And with the holidays approaching, having a positive outlook will come in handy...trust me!

Have an O’mazing week friends…

𝓞𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓪 𝓑. 𝓢𝓱𝓮𝓹𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓭

Life Empowerment Mentor/Transformation Coach

💲Black Friday Coaching Session💲

*Want to start a business and don’t know where to begin?

*Can’t seem to get out of you own way?

*Mindset all over the place?

If you have answered ‘Yes’…then have I got an offer for you…😊

For just $25 for 2 weeks of unlimited support of coaching….

Pick my brain about anything related to business, mindset, transformation, or personal development!

Being in business for 20 years I have learned a few things along the way, I also know if you don’t have the right mindset and accountability you will fail each time!!

What you get:
*unlimited support via email, messager, Zoom, or phone
*help writing vision and mission statements
*help coming up with a business plan
*mindset training and work on your confidence
*the real ins and outs of having a business (you know the sh** they don’t tell you)

So if you’re ready to Pick My Brain…let’s set up something now👇🏾
https://www.paypal.me/ashestobeautymentor

Setting Healthy Boundaries during the Holidays 🦃🎄

Taking care of your self and your body involves learning how to set boundaries in relationships. When you are stressed you are more likely to overeat, make rash decisions and lose sleep.When someone oversteps their bounds in your life or you are finding yourself arguing with someone it can turn on your fight or flight response causing high blood pressure, cortisol spikes, and weight gain.If you find yourself tensing up or changing your behavior around certain people maybe they have too much access to your life. Are you walking on eggshells to prevent a certain behavior?Stop 🚫it or stay away….I promise it’s ok to want to enjoy the holidays in peace without others drama…
If you don’t know how to set boundaries in relationships you will burn out and allow others to control your time and energy. It’s not selfish to set up boundaries, it’s actually very healthy.Here are a couple of affirmations to write down and recite before the Turkey 🦃and Christmas 🎄Tree Trimming….✔ I will not work harder on their problems than my own.✔I will not spend my time trying to change someone who doesn’t want to change.✔I will not allow the same person to repeatedly hurt me over and over.✔I will not change my behavior or my beliefs to appease others.It’s not your job to be everything to everyone and you should not be working harder on people’s problems than they are.Best Wishes on a great Holiday,Lady O 🦋Ashes To Beauty Mentoring & Outreach

Do You Suffer From Holiday Depression?….🦃🎄

Do you suffer from holiday depression, stress, and anxiety??

Do your family members make you crazy around this time of the year?…

Wondering what Aunt Edith will say to embarrass you around the holiday table this year? Thinking that Tums and Tylenol won’t be enough to endure the extra helpings of “sarcasm served cold,” that’s dished out by your mother in law?😒

If you dread family holidays with your cooked-out clan, you’re not alone. The Christian Post posted results from their recent survey: Twenty-four percent of individuals surveyed they dreaded seeing relatives and 16% stated that they did not look forward to attending holiday parties and events.🤷🏾‍♀️

According to an article in Entrepreneur.com, more than 60% of baby boomers, Gen Xers and millennials report feeling increased stress at holiday time. This is at least partially owed to strained relationships and forced interactions with family during the most socially overbooked and financially burdensome time of year.

So why, when we think of celebrating another year coming to a close, and celebrating that with our relatives, does this incite panic attacks and neurosis rather than a peaceful, and benevolent feeling? And a better question, how to avoid conflict at Christmas? Below, some reasons and solutions to family stress during the holidays.

Clashes of Personality

Not everyone has the same ideas about things, and that’s no more apparent than when the entire family gets together. Whether it’s quibbling over how long to cook the turkey, arguing over who gets to host and who gets to make the trip… not agreeing on how much to spend on presents, or navigating conversational minefields… different family personality types can come into conflict at holiday time for sure. And please don’t add politics to the mix…especially during this time!

“Secrets of a Positive Attitude”


Greetings Friends,

Are you constantly bombarded by thoughts of negativity? Plagued by feelings of insecurity? Do you see everything in a negative manner? The reason for this lies deep within your heart. You are what you mentally and spiritually eat. If a person drinks alcohol on a daily basis, odds are their body will be affected in some way. They may have liver issues, develop cancer or incur some other type of health problem directly related to the amount of alcohol they have consumed. In the same way, a person who constantly feeds themselves negative thoughts will simply turn into a negative person.

This is the time to go on a diet. A diet of positive attitude food. You have to literally stop feeding your mind negative things. Ask yourself is this thought negative or positive or negative? What do negative thoughts look like? Well, they start with can’t rather than can, no as opposed to yes, will and not won’t. The Bible which is the greatest self-help book ever written, speaks about taking every thought captive. The problem in our society has become that our thoughts have taken us captive. We have begun to let our thoughts control us.

A great way to know what we are negative about is to ask those people who are closest to us. You can ask your spouse
or another person in your life who really knows you how they would rate your attitude on a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being super positive and 1 super negative. Ask this person to be totally honest with you. You will benefit from their honesty even if it causes you pain. Ask this person what it is that you specifically say that they perceive as negative. Write down what they say and look at the actual words. Now is the time to be honest with yourself. Those words are a reflection of what is inside you. They are who you are. The great thing is that you can change. It is as simple as making a choice to do so. You must decide to replace the thoughts of negativity with thoughts of positivity. Decide what words you will change the negative words on your paper. Once you have done this, make an effort to insert these new positive thoughts in your mind. You will begin to notice a positive change taking place in your life. Your family, friends, and co-workers will all notice it as well. They may not know what is different about you. But they will know that you are not the same person that you were.

The items which are causing negativity in your life could very well be the news, movies, constantly replaying tragedy in your mind and the list could go on. These things should be eliminated if you want your new mental health regimen to be a success. The news is very negative and does not help someone who is trying to rid their mind of such thoughts. When you are feeding yourself thoughts of death from a war or gunshot or car accident visually the outcome will be negative. I do believe there is a time to grieve over the death of a loved one. However, if a person constantly replays this negative event in their minds it can lead to depression. The person who has passed away is not coming back and we must close that chapter in our lives and move on to the next chapter. This is a difficult task that can only be done by making a decision to proceed with our own life, no matter how hard this may be.

You can do it. You can and will have a positive attitude if you simply take the steps outlined above. You do not have to be what you were in the past. You can be different in the future. The choice is yours. I know you will make a positive one.

Much continued positive attitude success,

Olivia B. Shepherd💋
𝓛𝓲𝓯𝓮 𝓔𝓶𝓹𝓸𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓜𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓸𝓻
𝓣𝓻𝓪𝓷𝓼𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓒𝓸𝓪𝓬𝓱

*Don’t forget to check out my latest podcast🎙:

New Podcast Alert 🚨🎙

🚨New Podcast Alert🎙

Life isn’t fair. Everyone, at some point, has to deal with a painful or unpleasant situation that they did not deserve. While some people are able to cope with the “unfair” situation and then move on, others seem to get stuck.

Do you feel stuck?
Do you constantly blame others or yourself for your problems?

Or

Do you quickly move on and make lemonade out of lemons being thrown at you???

Check out this week’s podcast below to learn how to move beyond that victim mentality, so you can start living a victorious life 💫👇🏾…🎙

*p.s.* Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a rating for your girl😉💋

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/girl-your-journey-starts-here-podcast/id1450758610

https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9hbmNob3IuZm0vcy8yYmFjMjA4L3BvZGNhc3QvcnNz

https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/anchor-podcasts/girl-your-journey-starts-here-podcast

It’s My Birthday 🎉Weekend…🙌🏾

#30daysofthankfulness
#mybirthdayweekend

Sooooo it’s my birthday 🎉weekend and I’m so thankful after everything I’ve been through I’m still standing….

My birthday is my favorite thing on earth because for some weird reason I think I’m the only person born on this day 11/19🤷🏾‍♀️🤣

A lot of people think I’m too old to be celebrating, but they don’t know how much I’ve survived…..so with that being said, what birthday 🎈celebration are you thankful for?

Most of us are dealing with mental health issues and probably thought this illness would have taken us out by now, so let us know why celebrating another year of life was worth being thankful for 👇🏾🎂

Olivia B. Shepherd 🎉
Life Empowerment Mentor/Transformation Coach

#mybirthdayweekend #bethankful #birthdaycelebration #gratitude #survivor #warrior #mentalhealth #mentor #mentalhealthadvocate #transformationcoach #ashestobeautymentoring #outreach #celebratelife #lifeisworthliving